For many years women have been taught that you should find a man that is wealthy, then marry him whether you love him or not. It’s also been said that if you marry for love, you are weak and will be disappointed. Often times these conversations are sparked from bitter ex-wives or ex-girlfriends. They feel that even if a man has treated you like dirt, at least you got some money out of it; making it “not that bad”. I beg to differ with this train of thought; in this article I will share why.
Back in the 70’s prostitution was big business and many young women viewed pimps as their saviors. Most of these men seemingly came to their rescue and brainwashed them with “if it wasn’t for me you wouldn’t be or have anything, you need me,” so in return they would be indebted for life. Women were paid to do unspeakable acts to lustful men in exchange for a few dollars; as long as she got paid she made peace with what she had done. Pimps would then string their women along by buying them fur coats, diamonds, fancy shoes and handbags, but it was not because they desired to spoil them; they desired to keep them as their own. Sadly women would accept this by saying, “well at least he is providing for me,“ therefore justifying irrational treatment.
You may ask why I went back to that dark period in history, well many of you reading this article were born between the late 60’s thru the early 80’s and that mindset has traveled with you. Whether you are a Christian or not, sometimes even with your new found faith you find yourself struggling with the way you were raised versus Christian morals.
People who aren’t renewed in their minds tend to think: “USE SOMEONE BEFORE THEY USE YOU!” Well, it’s 2010 and while prostitution isn’t as open as it used to be, you do find similarities in the women associated with PRO Athletes and Mega Star Entertainers. They allow these men to disrespect them in exchange for what he can provide for them and this is done only because of the income he brings in, and it’s at that point you have put your worth in someone else’s hands. Often times you will hear “Yeah, I know he cheats but look how I am living!” as if that makes up for the betrayal. When Kobe Bryant was exposed nationally for his affair, he turns around and purchased his wife a “4 Million Dollar Apology Ring!” One woman may say, “Oh girl, forget what he did, they all do it, but at least you got a new ring out of it, LOOK AT IT BLING BLING,” while another woman will say “It’s a RING OF SHAME.”
If you go after a man because he has a fancy car, expensive house, plenty of money, etc. and you let him treat you any kind of way just because he has money, you’ve completely belittled yourself. Women, you have to know your worth and that “knowing” is priceless, don’t stoop low just to get a few dollars to get your hair & nails done or pay your rent! I was always taught, “beg no one for anything and have your own,” now that doesn’t mean you have to be extreme and say to a man “Skip you, I got my own, I don’t need you,” because that will completely turn a man off and keep you single. If a man desires to be a gentleman and takes you out to eat or a movie, you don’t have to slam your credit card down and emasculate him by saying “I got this,” that’s just tacky. Sometimes we think we are being strong women but it comes off as harsh and offensive to men and we push them away.
My last comment is geared towards men; I would suggest that if you don’t want a woman to come after you for your money then watch what you display to bring attention to yourself. Don’t use your money to influence her choices in being with you then change up later and say “she only wants me for my money, or what I can do for her” that was what you first showcased. Be wise and don’t fall victim to the Money Trade!
